Like, who even asked you for your opinion?

I happen to really enjoy Twitter…most of the time.  I can read interesting articles, interact with people from all around the world on issues that matter to me, and just type out my random thoughts.  And of course, I post the links to my articles.  Nothing changed a few weeks ago, and I posted the link to this article.  Some random dude decided to reply to my post with:

I despise when people try this nonsense with me.

You calling me pretty does not negate the fact that you just tried to invalidate my experiences and my article.

So, to the white man on twitter who replied to my tweet, let me tell you a little something:
  1. Get up out my mentions trying to tell a black person not to focus on “race stuff.”  Stay in your lane, Sam, stay in your lane.
  2. I will focus on whatever the hell I want to focus on.  As I said in a reply tweet, which you then made about yourself. Which leads me to…
  3. White men (and white people in general) are notorious for taking a conversation nobody invited them to and making it aboutIMG_5482 themselves.  Sam, where in my tweets did I talk about you or pretend to know your life? Where?  This is something that must stop and is also just plain annoying.  So, to Sam and to all the white people who do this, if a POC is talking about their experiences and they call you out on your privilege and the fact that you literally cannot comment in that instance, DO NOT make it about yourself.  First of all, you will get a very confused look.  In my instance, I’ll tilt my head to the side, raise an eyebrow, and think to myself, “But did I ask them to give me their life story, though?”  I get it.  You’re used to our entire society being about you.  But when you come up into a POC’s space where they are talking about themselves and their experiences and then try to make it about yourself, expect some damn backlash.  And don’t expect us to be nice about it, either, because we owe you nothing.
  4. You telling me I’m pretty literally doesn’t mean anything.  You wasted the 13 characters it took you to write that.  You calling me pretty does not negate the fact that you just tried to invalidate my experiences and my article.

IMG_5483.PNG This is something I’m finding very common on Twitter.  It’s like a special breed of white men who find the profiles of black women, pay us a “compliment,” then become upset when we call them out on their creepiness/offensiveness or don’t give them a thank you.  Somehow they feel entitled to our attenton and appreciativeness.  And this isn’t something I’m making up.  Sam is just one example.  I’ve recently had another run in with a white dude on Twitter who tweeted that he loved me while also spelling my name incorrectly, and when I called him out on spelling my name incorrectly, he became defensive, saying that I should stop being angry, accept the compliment, and that he would call me “babe” no matter what I said becaused he liked me.15908_original

This is real life, people.  And I checked out both Sam and this other Twitter user’s profile, and I was not an anomaly.  There is an entire community of entitled white dudes who find black women on Twitter, expecting us to bask in the fact that they are paying any attention to us.  And when we don’t give them the time of day that they feel they deserve, they become hostile and defensive, saying that we should stop being angry and should take the compliment.  These white men seek out our profiles for the sole purpose of interacting with us and trying to assert some kind of authority over our attention and gratitude.  As if calling us pretty and “babe” is somehow a gift.

Nah, bruh, it’s just creepy.

This goes beyond trolling.  I don’t know what to call it.  I also don’t know what possesses these white dudes to do this.  What satisfaction do you get out of it?  Do you have nothing better to do than follow random black women and harrass us on Twitter?  Like, bruh, we don’t know you and we don’t want to get to know you.

In the words of Beyoncé, #BoyBye!

Let me know your experiences and thoughts in the comments section below!


I’m on Twitter (@_AhtiyaL_), Instagram (@_AhtiyaL_), and Facebook (Ahtiya L).  Follow my accounts and like my Facebook page!  Please and thank you!

Yup, you guessed it.  @simplynottyxx and @NubianFelinity are both black women.